I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
