Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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