Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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