Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
