Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
