Soap is not a condiment
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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