im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Randomize