the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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