Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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