Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
