that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
