We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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