i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Randomize