Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
