The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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