Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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