Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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