Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
My vagina is very pro this idea
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
