the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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