help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
We have started to decorate penises.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
