after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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