how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize