I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
