FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
we're making bets on your personal life
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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