I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
