oh fat girl friday strikes again...
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
