Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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