If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize