not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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