Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
