There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize