A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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