its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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