let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
