I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
