I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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