Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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