She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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