at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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