real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize