wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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