On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
