No stitches, just platelets and will power
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize