curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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