Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Its about making memories worth repressing
fuck your aforementioned shoe
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
