it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
