so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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