check it out our google latitudes are spooning
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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