you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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