you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
